You have the most gorgeous eyes

It was the perfect buffer line, in the most typical and unimaginative break up e-mail. I am pretty sure if you Google “Breakup e-mail” this would be the first result.
A good break up e-mail requires a technique I call buffering (please do not quote me, I really have no idea. I’m just a girl that just got dumped, and I’m venting, so please, don’t take notes). Buffering is the art of placing the “It’s not working” between 2 generic and textbook like lines that usually refer to your eyes, your sparkling personality, etc. It’s that one beautiful little compliment that has a slim chance of distracting you from the feeling of overwhelming defeat and instant loneliness that will soon lead you to drunkenly giving your friends the “You don’t even KNOW” speech.
I recently received the break up buffer e-mail. Remember W, too charming..right. For an artist, I was expecting a bit more creativity, something a bit more out to lunch, something a bit more contemporary. I was not sure if I was more upset to not have him in my life anymore, or to not even be worthy of anything more than the typical buffer e-mail, that actually contained such content as “I like you, I do, it’s just...”, oh and the “I don’t regret anything..”.
Perhaps there are boundaries to all the beauty, creativity, imagination, and overly romantic bs that comes with having only 6 weeks with someone..something so new that it didn’t even have time to go sour. Perhaps when it comes to saying goodbye, it’s all out the door.
Everything is minimized to this one most generic and universal technique....”I think you have the most gorgeous eyes”..and, that’s a wrap.